I Can't Do That Anymore
by PrincessConsuelaBnhmk
Summary: Cora decides she can't take her life at Downton anymore.
1. Chapter 1

There were a lot of things Cora Crawley didn't know, but the one thing she knew without a doubt was that she couldn't stay there any longer.

Sometimes things don't work out. You try to make it work but eventually you have to realize that it isn't going to happen. When you make that realization, it's never pretty.

Cora had finally reached that point. She had spent months trying and failing to make them like her. Hell- who cared if they liked her, she would take them ignoring her if it meant the snide comments and the constant put downs would stop.

They were her family now and everyone told her she just had to put up with it. She had tried. She smiled at their sarcasm and ignored them when the comments were too mean to pretend not to understand. She had constantly been at their beck and call. Doing whatever they asked her to. At some point she realized she was more like a servant than a daughter-in-law.

Robert tried to be nice out of a sense of duty, but he really didn't like her and it was absolutely clear that his family always came first. She was merely a solution to a problem and now that the problem was gone he didn't know what to do with her.

He did his duty to the estate's future of course and came to her almost every night. It was always brief and slightly uncomfortable and he always left right after. The fact that they had been married for nine months and she still was not pregnant was quickly becoming one of Violet's favorite criticisms. She had lost count of the number of times she had heard Violet whispering with her friends about Cora's supposed lack of fertility.

"Sometimes I wonder if that American is even capable of carrying English children. Maybe she's just not made to handle it." The women would all laugh and list out all the much more suitable girls that Robert could have married who would of course have been with child already. Cora knew Violet said things like that to be cruel and that none of it was true, but it still hurt when she could hear them all laughing at her expense.

After she had finally come to her decision she decided to act on it as soon as possible. She snuck quietly up to the attic when she was sure that everyone was occupied and pulled down her trunk. In a pocket on the inside she found the stash of money that her father had made her keep aside for emergencies. It was enough to sustain her until she was able to get a message to her family.

She began pulling her clothing out of the wardrobe and placing them hastily into the trunk. She was facing the bed when she heard the door open. "Cora, I was-" She turned around and faced her husband who was standing in the doorway with a confused expression on his face. "What are you doing?"

She looked away from him and back down at her things. "I'm packing Robert."

"Where are you going?" She could hear him moving closer to her.

She spun around and came face to face with him. She looked directly into his eyes. "I'm leaving. I don't know where I'm going but I'm not staying here anymore." He gaped at for a moment unsure what to say finally spitting out words out.

"But you, you can't leave. We're married!"

Cora let out an unladylike snort and shook her head. "This was never a marriage Robert. It was a business deal." He made a noise as if to argue but quickly became silent as he realized that he couldn't disagree with her. He nodded at her slightly and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. She took a deep breath to calm herself and went back to her packing.

* * *

As she carried her trunk down the stairs she was surprised to find Robert waiting for her at the bottom. When she reached him he looked at her with an unreadable expression and said, "I called the carriage around for you. The man will take you wherever you want." He picked up her trunk, carried it outside, deposited it in the carriage, and turned around to face her again.

They stared at each other in silence, neither knowing what to stay. Cora had planned to leave a note. She had not intended to have to say goodbye to anyone. She finally found words to say just so that she could leave. "Robert,I'm so-"

"Please don't apologize." he interrupted, "This is my fault and I'm sorry for everything. For me and for my family. I hope you will forgive us one day and I wish you the best of luck. Send me anything you need me to sign." He bowed slightly and walked back inside. Cora flinched when the large front door slammed shut.

She had the driver take her to the Grantham Arms. The proprietor looked surprised to see the young wife of Lord Downton there by herself, but he showed her to a room and left her to herself.

Cora moved her trunk to the corner of the room and sat down on the edge of the hard bed. She rocked back and forth slightly, trying to hold back her tears. She didn't know why she was so emotional. She had wanted to get away for so long and she had finally done it. She didn't know why she was starting to feel as if it was a mistake. Eventually, she gave in to her emotions cried.

* * *

****_AN: Apologies for the angst. This is the first of two parts and I promise the next part gets better. Also, the rating may go up so watch for that. Please review!_


	2. Chapter 2

_AN: Part 2! Thanks for all your lovely reviews. I didn't expect to get such a great response! This didn't exactly happen as I planned and I could end it here, but if you guys want it I could add another chapter. Which would contain smut. It's up to you. Please review and have a fantastic day!_

* * *

Robert Crawley paced aggressively around his bedroom. He had seen this coming of course, he wasn't blind. He knew that his wife was miserable, but he really didn't know what to do about it. He tried to be kind to her, but he mostly came off stiff and awkward and made her even more uncomfortable. He chuckled ironically when he realized he would never have to worry about her happiness again.

He told himself that he should be glad she had left. He had her money and he was free to marry whoever he liked. He could find someone more suitable or even someone he loved. It didn't work though. He felt sick to his stomach and his heart was racing. He needed to do something, but he didn't know what.

He started when someone knocked loudly at his door. "Who is it?" He called harshly.

"It's Carson sir. Your father sent me." Robert opened the door to reveal the severe looking footman.

"Yes Carson?" He said tiredly.

"Your father is wondering why you and the lady haven't come down for dinner yet." Robert sighed. As much as his family disliked Cora, divorce was still scandalous and they would take a while to accept it. It wasn't a conversation he wanted to have right away.

"Tell my parents that Cora is not feeling well and that I will be dining in my room." Carson nodded, but gave Robert a strange look. He went to turn away, but quickly pivoted back to face the surprised lord. "If it isn't too forward of me to say sir, I saw the lady leaving today."

Robert swallowed deeply. "Carson, I-"

"I won't say anything sir." he interrupted quickly. "I just want to say that all the staff will miss her. She was very kind to us. If you do happen to see her, could you please tell her that she will be very missed by many in this house?" Robert nodded and watched him walk away. He retreated into his room and closed the door.

* * *

Cora was curled on top of the covers when she heard a knock on the door. She pulled herself up and wiped her eyes. When she opened the door she found the proprietors daughter with a tray of food. The girl smiled at her brightly. "My mother thought that you could use something to eat ma'am."

"Thank you. Please thank your mother for me also." She tried to smile at the friendly girl who was really only a few years younger than her. She wished she could still be so young and hopeful.

"You're welcome ma'am." The girl flounced away and Cora looked down at the food. It was much heavier than what they usually ate at Downton, but she was ravenous. She dug in and was surprised to find it was delicious. She finished every bite and set the tray on the end table when she was finished.

There was another knock at the door a while later and Cora answered it, expecting the girl back to collect the tray. She was completely bewildered when the person on the other side was her husband.

"Robert! What are you doing here?"

He cleared his throat. "I needed to talk to you Cora. Can I come in?"

"I suppose." She opened the door wider and allowed him to move past her. He walked in and faced the wall. He seemed to be collecting himself. She sat down on the bed facing him and folded her arms in front of herself.

Robert took a deep breath and turned back towards her. "Cora, I love you."

She looked at him dumbfounded. "You what?"

He kneeled in front of her and took her hand. "I love you and I couldn't let you go without telling you. I love you and I don't want you to go. Please stay with me. I will do whatever it takes to make you stay."

Cora still looked flabbergasted. "Where is this coming from Robert? I don't understand." She stood up agitated. "You can't you just decide you love me after I leave Robert. It's cruel and it's insulting that you think I would fall for it. You made it very clear the time I told you I loved you that you did not share my feelings. You told me to stop being ridiculous." Tears began streaming down her face at the memory.

He stood up quickly and went to her. She allowed him to pull her into his arms. "Cora, I am so sorry. I was an ass and I didn't realize how amazing you were."

She pulled back and looked up at him. "Even if you didn't love me, why did you let them treat me like that?"

He thought carefully. "I suppose it was because I am absolutely terrified of my mother." He looked up at her carefully, encouraged when he saw a small smile. " I've never had to stand up to them before and I didn't know how to start." She was looking at the floor and he couldn't see her expression. "Cora, do you think you can forgive me? I promise, I won't allow them to abuse you anymore. I will be different."

She finally looked up. "My mother always told me that people don't change."

"Your mother also told you it was a good idea to marry a titled Englishman. I think it's safe to say she doesn't know what she's talking about."

Cora snorted and laid her head gently against his chest. "You promise?"

"I promise." he swore emphatically. "I will love you and protect you for the rest of our lives."

She raised her head and gently brought her lips to meet his. "Forever" he whispered into the kiss.


End file.
